Break is for breaking.

This is my third year of college and therefore my third time having that wonderful three week hiatus of real life called winter break.  This is also my last year of college for the time being so my last time with these wonderful 21+ days of virtually zero responsibility.

In case you didn’t know, I 100% for sure have a type-A personality.  Meaning I like to plan things, maximize my time, make lists, not sleep in past 8:30, be productive, and feel like I am constantly making progress on something.  This list doesn’t sound like a break.  At all.  Yet, somehow the past two breaks consisted of too much of those things.

This was the first break I didn’t search out babysitting and other sources of income.  It was the first time my primary goals were to read and learn to knit and play piano more.  I had the most coffee dates I’ve had in a short time.  I didn’t plan on exercising everyday, make complex meals for friends and family, or making lots of money.

Instead I rested.  I reflected for probably the first time in my life on what all went down in 2015, I finished 7 books and am in the middle of another 4, I thought about what I wanted to do and become and go this year.

I feel so much more good about where I am and who I am becoming as a person.  All this because I let life slow down and kinda stop around me.  I leaned into relationships instead of lists and listened to what I wanted and needed out of the three weeks of nothingness.

The most amazing thing is I don’t feel lazy, I don’t have this weird self-judgement I have too much about myself when I don’t think I am doing enough.  Instead I feel totally rejuvenated and ready to take on this last semester of school.

So, moral of the story/note to self: let loose.  Mostly of your to-do list and expectation of constant productivity, but also in general.  If you aren’t enjoying the life you’re living, it’s all on you to adjust and make it something you love.

Here’s to the best break.  Where I made the least amount of money and didn’t do many productive things but felt the most alive and accomplished.

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